Making Money

The Ankh-Morpork Post Office is running not at all like a government office. The mail is delivered promptly; meetings start and end on time; five out of six letters relegated to the Blind Letter Office ultimately wend their way to the correct addresses. Postmaster General Moist von Lipwig, former arch-swindler and confidence man, has exceeded all expectations—including his own. Until Lord Vetinari summons Moist to the palace and asks, "Tell me, Mr. Lipwig, would you like to make some real money?" Vetinari is referring to the Royal Mint of Ankh-Morpork, a venerable institution that has run for centuries. Unfortunately, it costs more than a penny to make a penny, so the whole process seems somewhat counterintuitive. At the Royal Bank, the Glooper, an "analogy machine," has scientifically established that one never has quite as much money at the end of the week as one thinks one should. But before Moist has time to fully consider Vetinari's question, fate answers it for him.